Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
