Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I want a musical about memes.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
