you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
If that was your dad, he is hot
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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