I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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