Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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