her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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