Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
