she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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