If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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