Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
