Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
