Plan B is the new Plan A
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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