I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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