I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
