u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
