Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
