Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
