Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
