Say something about gay babies.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
