So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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