ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
