Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
