The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize