He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
