sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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