I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
