fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
