and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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