I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Damn victory sex feels great
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
