I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
