I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
