Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
NoShamevember. You game?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
