i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
this will be a night to untag.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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