He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
So. Much. Porn.
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