so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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