i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
