Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You're like the curious george of whores
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
