I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My vagina just recognized that song.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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