May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Randomize
