I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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