do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
