so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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