If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
