i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
