That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
