Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
