Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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