Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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