Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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