"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
The uberlube is also flammable
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
