The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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